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Regardless of the reason, there's one thing that's certain: infidelity is devastating. "In many cases, it forces issues to the surface of a relationship that would have never otherwise been dealt with," says Kevin Hansen, author of RELATED: 10 Surprising Traits Men Who Cheat Have in Common "From the day I married my husband, I knew it was a mistake," says 50-year-old Elizabeth Smith.* "He was abusive, controlling and expected me to quit my job to make a home for him." A little over a year into the marriage, she began having an affair with a man that she worked with."I had no illusions that I was in love, but it was eye-opening to be with someone that made me feel good about myself, made me laugh and respected me for who I was—not who he wanted me to be," she says.

When Vanessa Myers*, 28, married her husband six years ago, they both couldn't wait to have children, but after their wedding day something changed for her.

What You Can Learn: While what her husband did may be shocking, the fact that there was unaddressed anger in the relationship created fertile ground for an affair, says Dr. "Coupled with the lack of sexual intimacy there was nothing left to hang a relationship on," he says Even though the affair helped Vanessa learn some valuable lessons and the relationship was ultimately saved, Dr.

Silverman stresses the importance of open and honest communication in a relationship as a way for a couple to stay connected—before one of the spouses seeks comfort or intimacy outside of the marriage.

"I met a guy online and we dated for about a year," she says.

"It ended when my husband caught me." Vanessa and her husband agreed to seek therapy separately and together, and were able to save their marriage.

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    If you are concerned, about your kids' use of a Webcam, you might want to contact the PC maker to find out how to disable it.

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